


Happier

by nightmurmurs



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Arguing, Heavy Angst, M/M, Marriage, Post-Break Up, daisuga - Freeform, hate it here, i literally hate reading angst but here i am, no fluff sorry, pure angst, sorry haikyuu fandom, this has probably been done before but EH, this hurt to write, this is just angst, watching the person you're still in love with get married to someone else, well not anymore
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-04
Updated: 2020-08-04
Packaged: 2021-03-05 20:34:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 972
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25701424
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nightmurmurs/pseuds/nightmurmurs
Summary: It hurts to see the man you're still in love with get married to someone who's not you.(inspired by @/voidfulcosplays on tiktok)
Relationships: Sawamura Daichi/Sugawara Koushi
Comments: 3
Kudos: 16





	Happier

**Author's Note:**

> this was inspired by a pov by the lovely myles or voidfulcosplays on tiktok. i really enjoy his content, and will be linking it for anyone interested (i recommend checking out his stuff!). the tiktoks not vital to understanding this fic, but as i was inspired by it, im giving you the choice to watch it. i don't think i can make links in the notes, so it'll be just below this.

[(the tiktok im referencing)](https://vm.tiktok.com/JjFqk1h/)

[ (myles' page) ](https://vm.tiktok.com/JjFC3bk/)

Sugawara peered at his reflection in the ornate mirror, and tugged at the bottom of his waistcoat, straightening it. He looked put together, with his crisp shirt that was still somehow a stark contrast against his porcelain skin. He pulled on a navy blazer, which was snug against his arms, and buttoned it. He posed in the mirror, changing angles to look at himself. His dress shoes were shiny, and the baby pink flowers in his chest pocket were neatly arranged. He patted down his hair, willing for the strands to stay put.

  
  


‘Koushi? You dressed?’ A rap against the oak made him pause, and his given name made his tongue heavy.

  
  


‘Yes, come in!’

  
  


The door creaked open, the noise sour and intrusive. Daichi stood in the doorway, momentarily pausing before stepping towards Suga. 

He was already dressed; his suit was fitted, free from creases, and it highlighted his thighs, still broad from years of volleyball. Suga hadn’t seen Daichi in a suit since he was 21, when Daichi graduated from university. Now at 24, he still looked just as good.

  
  


‘Could you do my tie?’ he asked, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly, a cream tie loose against his chest. Suga let out a giggle, and motioned him closer. 

  
  


‘You still can’t tie a tie, after all these years?’ He teased, pulling gently on the tie, starting to tie it.

  
  


‘You always did it for me, I didn’t feel a need to learn!’ Daichi let out a nervous chuckle. 

Suga’s stomach twisted, the knife digging deeper, his hands trembling as he fumbled with the fabric. He finished tying the knot and patted his chest with both hands, signifying that he was done. They stood back at an appropriate distance, and Suga turned back to the mirror. He flattered his hair down again.

‘You look nice,’ Daichi complimented, moving to stand next to him, looking at his own reflection. The tips of Suga’s ears burnt at the compliment. It used to be kind and welcomed thought, and it used to make his chest feel like it was full of cotton. Now, it suffocated him, and left a bitter taste in his mouth.

He swallowed dryly.

  
  


‘I think flirting with the best man on your own wedding day isn’t approved of, Mr Groom.’ 

  
  


Suga was still staring at his own face in the mirror. His cheekbones were sharp, his cheeks sunken. 

Daichi laughed, deep and chesty.

His laugh was always a favourite of Suga’s. It made his legs jelly. 

After all these years.

Even if it wasn’t for him anymore. 

They stood in silence, simply staring at themselves somewhat narcissistically.

  
  


‘Well, I’ll see you on the main stage,’ Daichi turned to leave, but Suga caught his wrist. He trailed his hand up his arm, and placed both hands on Daichi’s chest again. Heat poured from under his fingertips, like radiation, gnawing at his skin.

‘Daichi, I-’ Suga faltered, and needles poked at his eyes, ‘you look happier.’ 

He stared at his own hands, which were tinged green, his knuckles raw. Suga inhaled, and puffed his cheeks out. No waterworks. Not yet. He churned the next words over in his head.

‘I knew one day you’d fall for someone new.’ 

The room felt impossibly silent, and blood roared in Suga’s ears. He straightened Daichi’s tie, though it was still neatly in the center of his torso.

  
  


Daichi let out a small ‘ah’. 

  
  


‘You deserve this. All this,’ Suga gestured vaguely, and Daichi remained relatively still. Suga removed his gaze from his own hands, and dared to look up at Daichi: his face was twisted in concern, his dark eyebrows drawn together. He had to look away, Daichi’s eye contact was too much. 

His skin itched.

  
  


‘Are you okay, Koushi?’ Suga nodded, and gently pushed him away. The name stung, like it always did nowadays. He shook his hands nervously, and let them fall uselessly at his side.

  
  


‘If he breaks your heart, Daichi, I swear I’ll fight him.’ he let a wet laugh, tears finally bubbling over. Daichi let out a small noise, and pulled him into a hug. 

Suga let himself be selfish one more time, and wrapped his arms around his waist, pressing his face into his shirt. Daichi hand moved from around his shoulders, and stroked his hair. 

Suga sobbed harder. 

Another knock on the door echoed through the dressing room, and Daichi released him from his embrace, giving Suga a warm, reassuring smile. 

  
  


‘You’ve got three minutes to get down there Sawamura! Otherwise I’ll marry your fiancé!’ A voice called, sounding a lot like Kuroo. He laughed at his own joke, he voice getting distance as he moved away from the door. 

  
  


‘You’ll find someone, Koushi, I’m sure of it. What’s not to like?’ Daichi tried to joke. Iron coated the inside of Suga’s cheek.

  
  


‘So why did you break up with me then? If there's nothing to dislike?’ Suga couldn’t help but lash out, but he regretted it before it even fully left his mouth. Daichi's face fell, and his mouth curled downwards.

  
  


‘Sugawara, I’m not doing this right now. I’ll see you downstairs.’ Daichi gave him a final squeeze on the shoulder and left, closing the door behind him. Suga listened to his footsteps until he couldn't hear them anymore. The room was suffocating. 

Even after being yelled at, Daichi still was kind, and gentle. 

Suga broke. He shattered. Like fine china, the splintered pieces were all over the carpeted floor. The shards poked into his skin, pressing into his arteries, jabbing at his organs. 

He clawed at his fringe. His nails dug into his skull, ripping at his brain. He messed up. He fucked up. Selfish. He let out a wail, his voice distance and unfamiliar.

  
  


Time was cruel. 

**Author's Note:**

> sorry gamers. if this sucks ass, im sorry lmaoo. i don't normally write or even read angst, but my 4am brain decided i had to write it before i keel over. i havent proof read, and i bet in the morning i'll reread this and be like well, that was shite. thank u for reading anyways!! mwah.


End file.
